10:29.08:134

She is a ghost; merely a phantom of future recollection.

10:28.08:133

Hers is not to be liked but to be remembered.

10:27.08:132

As the ho-hum rhythm of the train gently lolled away Albert's stresses he took notice for the first time of the woman who willed her way into the seat opposite his at the last stop.

10:26.08:131

Words are but a vice for that which should be understood in silence.

10:25.08:130

The yellow buzz of electricity that coughs through the phone lines- a painful reminder of just how much distance our voices have to carry

10:24.08:129

Still struggling with our weakness' and inabilities, though looking forward to small victories, we pushed on through the marshes and tired banks of mud.

10:23.08:128

And here a blown-out video of Thompson's fat, lisping son whining about their great deals, and closing with a laughable, although admittingly catchy jingle: "My dad thells Cadillacth...and unleth you are having a heart attack...come thtep through the door of Thompthon's Cadillacth and more."

10:22.08:127

The pacific-gray tinted blue of her eyes- the rarest of colors- found but once a year during the autumnal equinox deep on the horizon off the coast of Big Sur.

10:21.08:126

Upon reaching bottom and noticing for the first time that I was wet with perspiration, she pulled the bottom of her dress and patted down my cheeks and forehead.

10:20.08:125

She is plugged in and illuminates my journey.

10:19.08:124

...but I will use your colors as a crutch against the failability of my words.

10:18.08:123

Looking out my window, once transparent and now opaque with night.

10:17.08:122

There are words we dare not speak; we need not speak them now.

10:16.08:121

I then stood up and told them to thank me because when on their death bed filtering memories like silt through a river mouth, they would, no doubt, bring up this evening and laugh like children at the image of an orange moon as big as the autumn sky and a crazy young chap grabbing his balls like a saddle horn, crowing behind them.

-From a seven page autobiography found rolled into a child's metal thermos picked up at an estate sale in northern New England. Author Unknown.

10:15.08:120

Caught between a burp and question Albert Ibis asked the lovely young lady to his left for an 'Auuuuuughhhhhsprin'.

10:14.08:119

I could start with my being fired from my first job at Nabisco Foods, inc. where I was creating new molds for their animal cracker cookies to which I added anatomically correct genitalia.

10:13.08:118

The young man has a hard time getting in touch with his uncle and time passed.

10:12.08:117

It was aquamarine blue with a clear coat finish that had just about worn through everywhere but the hood and trunk which, when looked at just-so appeared as if they were in fact recent acquisitions.

10:11.08:116

He had two scars:

1. Above his left eye splitting his eyebrow lengthwise; a gift handed to him during the first of many cases of mistaken identity

2. A six inch, double stitch, located on the meaty part of his right pectoral 2" below his clavical; this one self inflicted in yet a latter case of mistaken identity

10:10.08:115

The first time Albert became aware of his condition he was too far gone to be helped.

10:09.08:114

I implore you to never close the book and yet leave these last words unread...

10:08.08:113

Now able to expose his need for the safety of her song and no longer risking just for himself but for this new creature that has made its home in the pulsing simplicity of a muscle no larger than a fist.

10:07.08:112

1. He was as weak as she and in need of a place in time far away from his imagined troubles and petty inconsistencies.

10:06.08:111

This was the singular gesture that forever changed her initial perception of the man.

10:05.08:110

We simply set out to do no harm; a circular task if there ever was one.

10:04.08:109

If only it were possible to make amends for those decisions I haven't yet had the opportunity to deny myself.

10:03.08:108

Three cobalt spheres, Two a shade of night, One a shade of day, O'er shafts of splintered sunlight, Creeping over white linoleum.

10:02.08:107

Many authors would change the name of she-who-must-not-be-named, out of some kind of voodoo-blackened carnie superstition, or most likely because they stay up late at night, sleepless, sweating, paralyzed to think or act, let alone write, out of the pure fear their particular name inspires.

10:01.08:106

Standing there, now looking at the impossible blackness and the billion points of hollow light, I could only think to myself that in fact, each of these stars ended up exactly where they were supposed to be.

9:30.08:105

Due to a terribly unfortunate but amazingly felicitous failure of the human brain, his name, although read Brunt and pronounced Brunt, actually registers in the delicate folds as Blunt.

9:29.08:104

our hero, in fact, eventually named himself after being passed from foster home to foster home due to the terrible reality that he had so little to offer the families so desperate to adopt.

9:28.08:103

As its hands gradually slow down, so too does the time that it keeps and so too does the time of those who are witness to it.

9:27.08:102

Edward Foley is a man of no consequence.

9:26.08:101

Andre Turvinov, the 64 year old letter carrier has been delivering his mail on a daily basis for the last 33 years, even showing up on Sundays with at least one letter he had withheld from saturday's delivery.

09:25:08.100

No truth is revealed, no one is stopped and no motive is given.

09:24.08:99

Light and time and all the things I try to bridge the gap between the nights.

09:23.08:98

...But to be sure before it is over there will be an horrific car crash on I-80 heading north from Miami to Orlando; there will be a downed airliner at jfk at the peak of winter; there will be reunions, expulsions, a blackout and of course . . . a murder.

09:22.08:97

She was wise to it; knowing that when 5 years from now her husband leaves her over the death of their son, he will forever be in these pictures smiling back from a past that will forever remain past.

09:21.08:96

There is a 90% chance that he will respond to the name John and even if it turns out he is someone else you will remain in his good graces as it would be an honor to even have been mistaken for one.

09:20.08:95

The Birth Canal for one is an autobiography of someone else, very much like myself, in which the author, very much like myself, conceives himself.

09:19.08:94

A brief pause as I take a few stifled breathes and tear up these first few lines in a pathetic display of weeping and apologizing for my hubris, begging forgiveness for even attempting this sad exercise.

09:18.08:93

Yeah well, I feel like myself, whomever that is...

09:17.08:92

there are only 365 different types of people; I hope you were born on the right day.

09:16.08:91

All this talk of increasing entropy is making me thirsty.

09:15.08:90

If the answer is 'yes', I would have to say I loved once.

09:14.08:89

ah.. but where are they now; those words that roll like ocean swells; eclectic combinations of syllabic bliss...

09:13.08:88

I'd then be forced to create something new or find a new way to create the same old thing.

09:12.08:87

No literary rhymes or riddles; nothing that could possibly interfere with your gaining an immediate understanding of this incredible act that clearly shapes all words that follow and neatly transforms all those that preceded it.

09:11.08:86

he walks into the restaurant which is completely empty except for the one waitress with the pretty face and long white shiny legs.

09:10.08:85

And now our hero doesn't know her at all.

09:09.08:84

oh dear reader, what I wouldn't give to have written that chapter for you; describing my leaving the bed to shower and her, now alone with the journal, and now cracking its weathered spine, oblivious to the instant turn her future path will take upon breathing in that first sentence.

09:08.08:83

Mine are from somewhere external; the shape of the tongue as it tries to feel its way through an unfamiliar sound.

09:07.08:82

The certainty of proximity and the silence of the thick summernight.

09:06.08:81

mothermary + time = bang*

*final translated entry of Seth Regent's open log prior to his disappearance.

09:05.08:80

She is a catalyst.

09:04.08:79

"Remember me," she pleaded, leaving in her wake the familiar smells of crushed autumn leaves and lavender.

09:03.08:78

Now, in a remarkable feat of coincidence, not unlike another of the famous author's characters, I too have stumbled upon my twin.

09:02.08:77

And in the long form of the shanks of the evening a life exists born out of time, "Don't underestimate the promises made;" a final salvo as the moon stretched its silver fingers to the west.

09:01.08:76

Thanks to the broken support on the fold out couch it takes 20 minutes to transform my spine from this new 'u' shape to the s-curve I've come so much to enjoy.

08:31.08:75

What I wouldn't give for someone to have seen from a different angle that which I absorbed through mine.

08:30.08:74

To Iliana , for whom I was fated to write this book but for whom I chose to write this book for anyway.

-Gustav Scholst
Paris, april xx87*

*exact year is unknown but '1887' is assumed as carbon dating describes the text as 19th century.

08:29.08:73

A decade past the last planet in the solar system Mikhail and Douglass sat eye to eye, desperately trying to gauge whether the man sitting opposite him just received the same notice from back home and, more importantly, whether or not he would be inclined to act on that information.

08:28.08:72

"Please," she whispered, her silken mane of rich black hair falling gently past her trembling shoulders.

08:27.08:71

It seems at times that I'm static and time is rushing towards me, but every now and then there is a small tear in the fabric and I find myself pushing steadfast towards a future which is firmly cemented in place.

08:26.08:70

Her features were spread out wide across her face- the beauty there was that of a desert landscape.

08:25.08:69

The rumor actually came from Harold Rather, a dedicated family man and perpetual, part-time detective who let slip that he thought Douglass Gant was schizo while trying to come up with any sort of conversation in the minutes that passed for post-coital bliss with his wife.

08:24.08:68

Margaret Leeds turned over what she thought was a seemingly insignificant bit of information to Lizzy Shoals while shopping for leotards at Marshalls.

08:23.08:67

She then looked skyward and expressionlessly offered, "we're all just old light, ya know."

08:22.08:66

there's this dream; a sort of of waypoint between two other dreams which have now shone their light every three months without fail for the last eight years.

08:21.08:65

"Be not afraid" she said, in a voice whose delicate timber was most certainly crafted for the singular purpose of uttering just those three words.

08:20.08:64

Thomas Jackson was found bloated and wet lying in the middle of his flat surrounded by the dozens of manuscripts published and those yet unpublished, clutching a little black book with each page covered in blue ink; a single sentence repeated thousands of times, whose three words would become the motto of the New Populist Republic.*

*Walter Huber. 'Nothing to Add'- The New Populist Republic Papers. 1st ed. 2334

08:19.08:63

...in the echo of a thought- the one that fades with each passing.

08:18.08:62

I realize I'm not without my fair share of personal hostilities- I did, however, once offer this homeless fellow half of an apple.

08:17.08:61

I sort of think that part of the problem with, ya know, the thing we're discussing... has more to do with the...well... you know, with the what, and not so much with the...with the why.

08:16.08:60

She, with the stone hands and uncontrollable enthusiasm, would try the patience of every last nerve as she took her place behind the keys of the recently acquired Blüthner.

08:15.08:59

In september of '74, as per my father's wishes, we mixed his remains with an old stash of Dupont gunpowder and packed the explosive into a 120mm mortar round.

08:14.08:58

No, you’re not the biggest douchebag in the world, Bobby- You’re just an ordinary douchebag like the rest of us

08:13.08:57

I've got one good breath left and I intend to keep it.

08:12.08:56

...and then time will stop and chaos will reign, and we'll float gently down the sides of a storm and drift into the desert where we'll wander unnoticed until we decide we're worth noticing.

08:11.08:55

in response to the question: "Do you mind?" the only acceptable answer is a resounding "YES".

c.1964 - chapter 1, sec. 6, part A- An Authority of The Minders by Richard Solomon

08:10.08:54

It is without any hint of apprehension that i reach out to touch this most sensitive place, this most celebrated place, knowing full well the reaction- always the same reaction, and understanding that the distance covered with this simple gesture will be greater than the length of words spoken laid out end to end and bringing with it the certainty that she will look in my eyes, take in a deep breath of air, exhale slowly, and believe in us again if even for a moment.

08:09.08:53

hers is the only round table which would be somewhat peculiar if not for the circular section of cracked earth directly beneath it.

08:08.08:52

There is an expression we have for when you can't quite remember something but I can't recall what it is.

08:07.08:51

Her hands are weightless- built for clipping the wings of a canary.

08:06.08:50

My voice, it doesn't carry far...sometimes I'm scared but sometimes, ya know, I'm just a little tired.

08:05.08:49

she gently rubbed the single blade of grass between her thumb and middle finger, the one with the freshly broken nail.

08:04.08:48

you grab her by the hand and make for the window on the second floor and you jump and the glass gives way a thousand times and the car is running and the doors are open and the tank is full and you make for the silver breath of light willing its way through the low dark clouds on the horizon.

08:03.08:47

And it was in the bowels of the train, in the bowels of the tunnel, in the bowels of the city that we met the gypsy.

08:02.08:46

The explosion most likely went unoticed due to the bombings that were happening all over Berlin at the time.

08:01.08:45

her breathing slowed to a graceful rhythm, imperceptible, short of the gentle rise and fall of the landscape of the one thin cotton sheet, dewy with perspiration, and I knew.

07:31.08:44

Please disregard all current emergency signals in County Derrick-A... there is nothing you can do.

07:30.08:43

Here we have a grown man whose life has all but stopped, drinking in the slow steady drip of insecurity due to one of a thousand, seemingly unrelated, factors all of which, in fact, can be loosely traced though a spider's web of memories to the moment- at 5 years old- he decided to use his bedroom closet for a toilet.

07:29.08:42

Cautious and sweating the foul stench of Leopold's last meal they sat to contemplate the impenetrable darkness that neither she nor the hero sitting beside her had, as of yet, figured out how to illuminate.

07:28.08:41

Try not to let the door hit you on the way in

07:27.08:40

And they instinctively knew it would take some distance from the event to pull that moment from the lattice-work of indefinable chaos which takes over due to the initial shock of discovery.

07:26.08:39

Its a secret that passes by all cognitive function and enters the mind through the heart of one's blood, priming the body to act on instinct alone.

07:25.08:38

Looks like the lunatic fringe is out recruiting tonight.

07:24.08:37

"You don't have a sheet do you... you can wrap me up like a piece of meat n' put me in the freezer"

07:23.08:36

Douglass Rent was sure he saw an elderly woman approach the causeway overpass of her own free will only to witness, moments later, a 30 car pileup born from one driver's decision to try and avoid the rapidly falling body.

07:22.08:35

The girls were unsettling to be around; the odds of them covering you in kisses or alternatively pecking out your eyes carried equal weight.

07:21.08:34

and here was the final thought she managed to scratch into the floor :

"i just handed myself to the universe- my molecules became those that make up the room i am sitting in as well as those that become the meat of the stars in the far reaches of the universe- i am everything and everything is me- in such a state there is no fear because you are that fear as well- there is just the moment- and that moment is peace."

07:20.08:33

Your eyes adjust rather quickly though and all at once the atmosphere suggests those kinder, gentler conditions that combined with even a hint of alcohol brings out everyone's best features.

07:19.08:32

The modest apartment, littered with notes and stacks of markers, was paid in full by a relative of little consequence other than having left a note taped to his chest, prior to passing, which read , 'Alexi, the flat is yours'.

07:18.08:31

Locus, although tired from the unnerving low level hum, presses the heels of his palms deep into the folds of his carbon stained brow, dragging his fingers through his thinning black hair taking with them a few more strands- always a few more strands, and proceeds to discuss with no one in particular the qualifications he once possessed that guaranteed his current position.

07:17.08:30

She read to me two lines from a letter she had written a dozen times but never sent- the first line was, "I'm leaving"- I never heard the second line.

07:16.08:29

He checks himself, thinking how sad it is that he writes this nonsense, line after line, in his little black pad.

07:15.08:28

'causal impartiality' is not a phrase I throw around lightly, mostly due to the fact that I truly have no idea what it means.

07:14.08:27

I've no doubt she's teaching the Super a thing or two about testicular voltage.

07:13.08:26

According to papers recently unearthed on the adriatic dig, the primary, guiding philosophy of H.R. was that "The path of least resistance is the natural order of things."

07:12.08:25

In between the second and third inspection they gathered their wits and proceeded to enact plan 'B'.

07:11.08:24

Sometimes even the best laid plans won't get you laid.

07:10.08:23

She breathes for the both of us now- (it seems we need so little these days.)

07:09.08:22

And the baker walked out of his kitchen, a smeared thumbprint of flour still on his lapel.

07:08.08:21

life is an invariably fatal disease.

07:07.08:20

so he sits and waits, day after day, for the mailman to come and show his hand upon dropping the mail through the front door.

07:06.08:19

I pressed play on the vcr and the grainy images erupted in a rush, faster than the reality they portrayed, as if lingering on any one moment too long might cause them to disappear altogether.

07:05.08:18

you know, with a name like that, in a place like this, it's hard not to feel like you are always letting somebody down.

07:04.08:17

An unsubstantiated rumor set in motion a complicated turn of events that would eventually lead to the inescapable present.

07:03.08:16

In the documentary it was noted that the first task of the BSC code breaker team of women was to learn to break the wax seals.

07:02.08:15

And so at the age of forty two, facing, a most likely, rapid decline in memory, I had my name and address tattooed on the inside of my left forearm.

07:01.08:14

Their decision to remove every last tree has made walking at night quite unnerving.

06:30.08:13

I'm nearing a breaking point; you know, the kind of point where things break.

06:29.08:12

It was only just yesterday, and not without a fair share of personal indiscretion, that I followed her through the gilded curtains.

06:28.08:11

If in fact we presuppose the former, does the latter, automatically, become the defining agent?

06:27.08:10

He was less afraid of a prison term than he was of spoiling his family's good name.

06:26.08:09

On the right side of the waiting room is a small desk situated beside a full size shredder and a display of pamphlets outlining u.s. citizenship requirements which no one takes.

06:25.08:08

She is a ghost of street lamps and things that bring on the evening.

06:24.08:07

I can only imagine the shitstorm of perversion being acted out in that rat-trap of a basement.

06:23.08:06

There is an inelegant opposition approaching.

06:22.08:05

The present precedes both the past and the future simultaneously.

06:21.08:04

Yes, including the woman downstairs who wears her flesh like a raincoat.

06:20.08:03

The next morning, while taking a walk along the dunes, she suffered a shortness of breath; she blamed the elephant grass, I suspected panic.

06:19.08:02

My authority as a citizen must be waning.

06:18.08:01

The silk smokescreen of her charcoal black hair clouds my vision and stifles my breath.